Silly Rabbit
by xXHellfireXx
Summary: A BalxFran fic [cuz they kick ass]. It's about how they met and how they became partners and all that good stuff. ingame and post game spoilers. M for language and sexual themes [no actual sex though, sorry.]


k, I've been meaning to write a FFXII fic fo a while, but never got into it. Wrote the first chapter today actually. It's not all that good compared to some of the other fics I've read, but hey, what are ya gonna do. Please don't flame. You flame, you suck. Constructive criticizm is always welcome though. If you have any tips, that'd be great.

Disclaimer: I don't own shizz

Rating: M to be safe, mostly for language and sexual themes. (doubt there will be any actually lemon though. I could write a good one [I'm dirty like that but there's all that nasty legal stuff.)

BALxFRAN ALL THE WAY!! THOSE DUMBASS BALxASHE FANS NEED TO RECOGNIZE!! FRAN COULD KICK ASHE'S PRISSY LITTLE ASS ANY DAY!!!!

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_Chapter one: Bunnies and Boys_

Curse these people.

Curse this place.

Curse this world.

I hate all of it. This whole damned planet and everything in it. It is all worthless. All of it.

No. No, what is really worthless is that man. That beast that I once called 'father', though he never truly was a father to me. A father is not supposed to treat their son the way he did. A father is not supposed to control everything their son does with little or no regard for his son's wishes. A father is not supposed to…no. No more about him. He is dead to me now. All of that is dead to me. Him, the Solidors, the judges, my professors, Draklor, the royal palace…it is all dead. I hope it rots in hell for everything it has done and will do. Nothing in this world even seems desirable anymore. It all disgusts me.

Ugh, the door opens yet again. That stupid bell is extremely annoying. I hate whoever has just entered this god forsaken pub for making that god forsaken bell ring. Who is it anyways…?

Oh my.

She's beautiful.

I take back what I said. Not everything in this world is disgusting or undesirable. This creature, this angel, she is amazing. She's perfect. Her smooth dark skin, her beautifully curved frame, her large ruby eyes, her long flowing silvery hair, her big, long ears.

Wait. Big, long ears? Could it be that this goddess is one of those, Vierun, Vierma, Vier…whatever they are. She's sitting by herself. Everyone is staring at her. Those men over there are drooling over her as if she were a piece of meat. Am I drooling? I better check. Nope, no drool. That's good. Perhaps I should go talk to her. Perhaps she can bring me out of this horrid mood.

"Bartender, two beers please."

I should never have come to this place. All these fools are staring at me as if I were a piece of meat. Hmph. Humes will never change I suppose. Oh well. It matters not. I only came here for a quick drink and then I'll be off. Then why am I just sitting here? What's this? One of them actually has the courage to confront me? A boy at that. He looks horrible.

"Hello miss. I couldn't help but notice that you were sitting by yourself, and I was wondering if you would like some company? I even bought you a drink."

He's trying too hard. He's cheesy too. Well, he did have the stones to come talk to me, so I suppose I'll humor him.

"Thank you."

He sits. He's a handsome boy, but a boy nonetheless. I'm guessing about 17 or 18. He looks as if he's lost everything. His hair is ruffled, his shirt is wrinkled and untucked. His eyes…his eyes are depressing. They look like dull stones, so dark and sad. This Hume must have-

"So, you are a Viermoo, huh? I must say I've never met one before."

"What did you call me?"

"U-um. You are a V-Viermoo aren't you?"

"I do not know what this, Viermoo is, but I assure you I am not one. I am a Viera."

He's blushing…profusely. His face is beet red. He must have mispronounced Viera and realized it. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer is he.

"Yes, yes, that is what I meant."

That smile of his, it's enthralling. For someone who looks so forlorn and depressed, he sure can put on a good act.

"So, did you just arrive in Archades? We don't see too many Viera here. This place is only filled with boring old Humes. Sometimes you see a Baanga or a Seeq…though it's not always a good thing. The smell often ruins the moment."

He tried to make a smart remark. He is foolish. This bar is filled with Baangas and Seeqs, and he is not exactly being quiet.

"Yes"

"Don't talk much do you?"

"Perhaps you talk too much."

He looks horrified. He is too easy. Maybe that's what I need right now, someone easy, just to relieve myself. He would probably shoot his load in his pants if I just asked him though…

"Well, since I am talking to such a beautiful woman, can you blame me for trying to milk it for all it's worth?"

Ooooh, he's horny. His voice is filled with lust. Silly Hume-child, you have no idea what you're in for.

"Would you like to accompany me back to my room? I'm staying in an inn just down the street. It's rather late and I'm unfamiliar with this town. I don't want to risk getting jumped."

His eyes lit up. He looks like he just got a birthday present

"Why, yes. This part of town is filled with all sorts of thugs and lowlifes. Mostly the Baangas and Seeqs you know. It's not safe for a woman to travel all alone at night."

"Thank you sir."

"It's my pleasure."

Again that grin. He's such a dumbass.

I cannot believe she actually is taking me back to her room! Everyone is jealous, I can feel them shooting daggers at me from their eyes. Tonight is going to be amazing, I can just tell. I'll truly be a man tonight. No more silly Hume girls for me, no. I am Ffamran Trefulus Bunansa, bedder of Viera. Oh shit, I hope she isn't mad at me for mispronouncing that. Ffamran you dumbass, why did you not pay attention in class. You did a whole unit on Viera in biology.

"Would you like to finish your drink first?"

"I already have."

What? Did she even touch her mug? It's empty! Is that possible? Why do I care, I'm going to have her tonight and that's all that matters. Oh this has cheered me up considerably.

"Shall we?"

"Yes my dear. Just tell me which in you're staying at and I'll get you there safely."

She muttered something, but I couldn't hear it. I downed the rest of my drink and followed her outside. It was very late, but not at all dark. The moon was full and bright tonight. It illuminated the dark empty street we were walking on. I couldn't help but admire its beauty. What a perfect day to choose my escape. Not only am I going to bed possibly the most beautiful creature in all existence, but the moon herself is showing off her goods for me tonight.

"So my dear, do you have a name? Or don't angels need names?"

"Fran."

"Fran, huh. That's a strong name for such a fragile looking woman. If I hadn't seen you in person I would have thought you were some ugly old fat hag."

I immediately regretted saying that. She looked as if she was going to bite off my head.

"I'm terribly sorry my dear Fran. I did not mean to offend you."

Good, that seemed to have worked.

"Well, umm my name is Ffamran."

She let out a laugh, but quickly caught herself. It sent shock waves down my spine. Her laugh was like music. I almost wished that she had continued to laugh at my name. I wouldn't have blamed her either.

"Yes I know, it is a rather stupid name. My father was a rather…"

There goes my mood again. I just had to mention my father didn't I. I noticed she was staring at me."You're father was rather what?"

"Nevermind. So where did you come from?"

"How old are you?"

"Hm? I'm 18, why?"

"Just making sure."

"Just making sure…of what?"

"That you're legal."

This confused me. She is so stoic and emotionless, it's hard to determine what she means. Hmm? Uggh, what is that foul smell?"Do you smell that?"

"Perhaps a Seeq is near."

I laughed at that. So she remembered my stupid joke. I really had not thought that out very well. That bar was filled with Baanga and Seeq. I'm surprised I got out in one piece.

"_Snort_"

Shit, it can't really be a Seeq can it?

"Bet you think you're pretty funny don'tcha ya dumbass Hume."

Damn, it is a Seeq.

"Thought ya could get away wit makin' fun o' us did ya?"

Two Seeqs?

"Well we came here ta put you're little pussy ass in it's place. Right in front o' yer slutty lass too."

THREE Seeqs? I'm a dead man. Though that last part was a little uncalled for. Fran hasn't done anything to them.

"Is that anyway to talk to a lady? Especially one as beautiful as this? Did your mothers teach you nothing?"

"Shut up ya pussy! Stay quiet so we can get this over with. After we're done here I'm gonna fuck yer girlie her, right in front o' yer face too. Hheheheeh."

Now that was _really _uncalled for.

"Bring it hamshanks."

I readied myself for what I knew would be a sever beating. The first one came after me, but I managed to dodge his charge and nail him one right in the gut. The other two came up behind me though. One of them held be back while the other proceeded to punch me in various places. All of a sudden though, it stopped. I heard a wail and a loud crash. I looked up and saw the Seeq that was hitting me lying unconscious about 20 feet down the road. To my surprise, Fran was standing in front of me, her back to me.

"Fran?"

"What tha hell?! How did ya do that ya bitch!"

She flipped up into the air and landed behind the Seeq that was holding me. She elbowed him in the back. He let go of me and I fell to the ground. I quickly got up to help her, but it was obvious that she didn't need my help. She was taking the remaining two Seeq on as if they were nothing. She kneed one in the gut and sent a roundhouse to the other one's face, which in turn sent him flying about 15 feet. She spun back around with such grace and jumped onto the other Seeq's sholders. At that moment, I will never forget what I saw. While she was on the Seeq's shoulders, she was directly in front of the moon. The light shimmered off of her. Her skin glowed, her hair glistened, her eyes glimmered like gems. Then, as if it were some sort of dance, she spun and flipped backwards, taking the Seeq with her. The poor pig went flying.

I was in shock.

"Shall we continue. The inn is not far."

"Well, we took care of them didn't we?"

I rolled my eyes, thankfully he didn't see. This boy was hopeless, though he did throw a pretty good punch.

"That was truly amazing Franny."

"My name is Fran."

"Yes, I know, but Franny is a good nickname is it not?"

"I do not need a nickname. Fran is my real name, I'm content with it."

"Well, sure but don't you want another name? A name that your friends can call you by?"

"I do not need friends, nor do I want any."

I caught a glimpse of his face then. He looked as if I impaled him with a sword. Humes are so fragile it's almost sick.

"I…I see. Well then, you shall be known as Fran, and only Fran."

I did not respond. I didn't need to, I knew he would think of something else to say."Well, I sure would like to get a new name."

His voice was full of disgust and loathing now. I'm guessing he has serious issues with his family, for him to speak with such hate like that. Hmmm, family problems….we are not so different you and I.

"I hate my name. What kind of name is Ffamran anyway?"

"What is your full name?"

"Ffamran Trefulus Bunansa."

I let another laugh slip out. Damn it. I should be able to control myself better than this. I could have heard the funniest joke in all Ivalice and I'd still manage to not laugh, but this Hume…he brings this out of me. It should not be so. Maybe it was a mistake to choose him. That one Baanga back in the bar didn't look so bad.

"We're here."

"Oh good."

We quietly walked up the steps to my room. When we got inside, I locked the door and closed the windows. As far as I know I'm the only one on this floor. I can only hope that no one will hear us. I tend to make noise when I do the deed.

"Take off your clothes"

"Pardon?""You heard me, now take off your clothes."

"A-alright."

He's inexperienced. I can tell. Two, maybe three before me, and all young. He's never experienced an older female, much less a dominant one. If only he knew how old I truly was. I'm old enough to be his great grandmother. Best not tell him that though, he might get bad images.

I watched him undress himself. He unbuttoned his shirt and let it slide off his shoulders. He threw it over a chair and proceeded to work on his shoes.

I looked at his torso. For a Hume, he was beautiful. His skin was smooth and creamy, his body was well built. He wasn't big, but his muscles were toned and sculpted. The bruises from the Seeqs were blemishes that ruined his godly body. He took off his shoes and set them behind him. I noticed a rather nasty scar on his back.

"How did you get that scar?"

Damn it Fran, what's the matter with you? You've never been so talkative before. Stoic and calm, that how you always are, and now all of a sudden you're asking questions that have nothing to do with you.

"Oh, that…"

He looked depressed again.

"It's nothing."

This Hume is a puzzle to me. Never before has a Hume affected me in such a way. This Hume makes me act like a completely different person. We must get this over with.

He started to unbutton his pants.

"Um, are you going to undress too?"

"Eventually."

He just stared at me for a moment and continued removing his pants. There he was, naked, standing in front of me. I marveled at the rest of his body. His legs were beautifully sculpted and just as smooth and creamy as his torso. I was surprised to find the only body hair he had was around his dick. I guessed that he shaved everything except that, though it's obvious that he trims that too, it looks perfectly in place. I usually prefer hairier men. The just seem more…manly than these smooth ones. Oh well, I won't complain. This Hume is definitely one of the nicer looking ones I've had.

"F-fran?"

"What's troubling you?"

"Are you going to undress now?"

"Are you uncomfortable?"

"Well, I'm standing her, naked, and you're staring at me as if I were some test subject. Yes I'm a tad uncomfortable."

"Would you like for me to undress?"

"Yes that would make me feel less awkward."

"Very well."

What took him minutes only took me seconds. I was out of my leather armor and stilettos in no time. His face was full of surprise. I guess he wasn't lying when he said he'd never met a Viera.

"Well then, shall w-"

"Play with yourself."

"Ex-excuse me?"

"Play with yourself."

"I-I…umm…w-…why?"

I smirked at him and he gulped.

This was going to be fun…..

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The next morning I woke up around 5. I let him stay with me.

flashback to the night before

_I rolled off of him and laid there. We were both out of breath._

_"Did I get a good grade?" _

_"Well, you were certainly well…prepared…"_

_He grinned. I have to admit he was very well endowed._

_"However your presentation was clumsy and your oral performance was sloppy."_

_He looked mortified._

_"I'd give you a B-."_

_"Hm. That's better than I thought."_

_I smirked. "Hadn't you best be off?"_

_His smile faded. "Y-yes, I guess I should go now…"_

_He moved to the edge of the bed and stopped._

_"Fran."_

_"__Ffamran__."_

_"Could I perhaps…stay here, with you? I'm afraid I have no where else to go."_

_I stared at his back for a while._

_"Yes."_

_He turned to face me. We stared into each other's eyes for a while. He smiled again, not his usual playboy grin, but a warm smile._

_"Thank you."_

_"You're welcome. Now sleep."_

_"__Hmph__. Not much fun __are__ you? The night is still young, we could play some more."_

_"__You are __exhausted ."_

_"Not at all!"_

_Just then he let out a long yawn._

_"Oh? Then perhaps we can try something I've always wanted to do."_

_"__Mmmm__, sounds kinky."_

_"It is." I sat up and walked over to a table that had fruit in a bowl. I grabbed a banana and walked back over to the bed. "Have you ever had anal sex?"_

_"Well…no."_

_"I have. It's quite enjoyable actually. Though I've never seen a man __be__ the bottom before."_

_"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean."_

_"Well, I've always wanted to see how a man reacts to having something shoved up his ass for once."_

_His eyes went wide._

_"Gee Fran, I'm awfully tired, __maybe__ we should call it a night."_

_"Are you sure?"_

_"Oh yes, quite sure."_

_"You never know, you might like it."_

_"Maybe some other time."_

_"A wise decision.__ Now sleep."_

_"__Godnight__ Fran."_

_He smiled at me again. That's all he does is smile._

_"Goodnight, __Ffamran__."_

end flashback

I got up and out of bed as quietly as I could. I did not want to wake him. I would pay for the room and ask the inn keeper to let him sleep here for a while longer. I was off to Rabanastre to pick up something, and then I'd be off to Balfonheim. I walked over to my pack with out making a sound and started to get dressed. It did not take me long. I grabbed some of the fruit off the table and put it in my pack. I swung it over my shoulder and headed for the door.

"Fran?"

Shit.

"Where are you going so early?"

"I must go to Rabanastre. Go back to sleep. I'll pay for the room, I'll ask the inn keeper to let you stay her a bit longer."

"Oh…um…well…"

I could feel the sadness in him. He looks so lonely. I almost feel…bad for him. What!? Fran, no! You cannot have feelings for this boy. It is just not possible. Say good bye and never think of him again.

"Last night was…nice."

He looked up at me with his gorgeous chestnut eyes and smiled.

"Yes. Yes it was."

A silence fell over the room. It wasn't awkward, nor was it comfortable. It was as if the silence was trying to delay my leaving, as if it wanted me to stay longer.

"Well then, good by my dear Fran. I hope we meet again."

"Yes. Good bye Balthier."

"Pardon? What did you call me?"

"You said you wanted a different name."

He smiled again. "Yes. Thank you."

I gave him a nod and a small smile and was off.

"I hope we meet again too…"

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So that's chapter one. Reviews would be nice, though I doubt I'll get very many...

REVIEWS BITCHES!!!!!! thanks!! D

Chapter two will be up eventually, who knows when, so don't hold your breath.

peace!!

--.xXHellfireXx.


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